It’s Almost Thanksgiving! Recalibrating Traditions
The novelist Henry James once said that for tradition to stay alive, something must be added to it. I’ve been thinking about that because my family’s holiday traditions are increasingly changing these days.
Traditions matter. My daughter was a champion for them growing up and has carried the idea of tradition into her own family. It’s gratifying for me to see because, as a single parent of an only child, I was committed to making sure she had a solid and positive family experience not just limited to the two of us. Traditions were a part of that.
Over the years, I’ve marveled at how she honors and yet changes some of those traditions. Food is always an easy place to spot this. The tradition of a particular recipe holds, but it’s got a new twist – she’s made it her own even as she gives homage to the one who passed it down to her. And that is exactly how it should be.
We pass along the gift of the tradition, even as we ask them what they will make of it. As I’ve been following some popular blogs and columnists about this, it’s been clear that we’re also moving beyond just our menu when it comes to creating new traditions. Here are seven ideas I found inspiring:
Celebrate everyone’s birthday – now that’s a new twist! If your family get-togethers are limited these days – make the birthday celebrations a part of Thanksgiving! Make your time together the gift with a few personal touches and cards. And, of course, the ultimate birthday cake. Just don’t forget the candles!
Host a potluck dinner – we’re all familiar with these! But you may not have thought of it for Thanksgiving. The burden of one person being responsible for all the food can be daunting! Expand the celebration by sharing what goes on the table. If you have loved ones and friends coming from various backgrounds, ask them to bring a special dish that can also help celebrate diversity. Someone still needs to make sure it’s coordinated, but that’s much easier than taking it all on.
Speaking of dishes – Make a special dish! This idea is a beautiful way to remember those that filled our now empty chairs. If someone always made a signature dish, make it in their place as a way of remembering them and passing along those memories. My Mom had several that I know we’re continuing.
Make Thanksgiving a family giving event! There are many ways to do this. First, you can set up a plan for you and your friends or family to volunteer where food is being served to those that otherwise might go without. Second, you can ask guests to bring non-perishable foods with them and put a donation together for a food bank. Finally, depending on your climate- ask guests to bring a coat or sweater and create your own family coat drive!
Need to get your bodies moving? Try one of the local “turkey trot” races that are popular. These can be great fun – and you can even dress up for the occasion and add some laughter. Too much? Just organize an after-dinner stroll for everyone – including the kids.
6Don’t wait on this one – the sooner you begin, the better! Start the tradition of turning a tablecloth into a keepsake. You use a white tablecloth and then scatter cloth markers at each place setting. Ask each guest to write – or better yet – draw what they are thankful for! Use the same tablecloth year after year, and it becomes an integral part of the family memory book.
A personal favorite – have a movie you return to year after year. We do this at Christmas routinely. Why not Thanksgiving? Not sure where to start? Borrow this one: A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving. It’s from 1973. I had recently graduated from high school, and one of our last productions for the drama group was You’re a Good Man Charlie Brown. Playing Miss Lucy was an experience I’ve never forgotten! Charlie Brown is always worth sharing.
Pat Conroy is one of my favorite authors. You’ve no doubt seen his work at the movies, even if you haven’t read it. He said that “The human soul can always use a new tradition. Sometimes we require them.” I don’t think the time has ever been more perfect for doing just that.
I hope that you take these ideas and adapt one or two for your own celebrations. When you do, you will undoubtedly make this a Thanksgiving to be remembered!
