Cathy and the 5 cups: Living Intentionally

The walk back was only about 15 minutes and a beautiful walk it was, along the Adige River in Verona, Italy. I was still laughing at myself; how obvious it had become that I hadn’t even made space but that it was a dream I could see so clearly.

What was the dream? Sitting with my morning coffee and enjoying it with my partner - reading, talking, just being in the space with one another. So simple, and yet….

I was divorced in 2018 after 29 years of marriage. It was now April, 2022. I’d dated, been in and ended a long-term relationship, had written my list of non-negotiables for partnership, and yet I purchased only 1 coffee cup. Let me explain.

I was in Verona, Italy. I’m all about working from anywhere and from March 26 until April 22, 2022, I was living in Italy with a girlfriend and her husband, working remotely, and on a bit of a spiritual retreat – intentionally spending quite a bit of time each morning in prayer and Bible study, visiting each of the churches in town for God time and allowing time to ponder my future.

As the end of the trip drew near, I wanted to bring a piece of the experience home. And as luck would have it, we had walked into a fabulous little kitchen shop with brightly colored pottery coffee cups. I immediately bought the orange one and was so excited with my choice. As I was thinking about my purchase the following morning, it dawned on me… how could I expect to enjoy a quiet morning with my partner and a cuppa coffee if I’d only bought ONE coffee cup. So … I walked back along the Adige for more cups – 4 more to be exact – to complete the color collection.

Setting intentions is powerful. It’s not wishing and hoping, it’s creating the life you dream of… with prayer and intentional living. This goes for your work, your health, your finances, and your relationships. I knew I was meant to be in partnership and that my “person” would come along when God saw the time was right, for both of us. But I had only made “space” for me. My one bedroom with one bathroom with one sink. My closet was stuffed and no room for another. And one coffee cup. Yes, sounds silly doesn’t it, but I don’t think so.

Here are 4 keys to remember when it comes to setting intentions:

Set intentions without expectations. Like I said, this isn’t about hoping and wishing and expecting your dreams to come true. It’s prayerfully and mindfully setting the intentions for your life and knowing that God has the best outcome planned, which may or may not look like your specific outcome. When you can let go of the expectations and embrace the outcome, amazing things happen. Set the intention and release the outcome believing that the best will be.

Accept the timing. It’s God’s timing, period. You can set goals and work towards them for sure, and you should. But ultimately, He is in control.

Intentions must be followed by the work. Pray hard and work harder. Or was it work hard and pray harder. I don’t remember… but the point is this – intentions, manifestation or whatever you want to call it, is not done in a vacuum. You must do the work that only you can do. Let’s take the relationship example. The number of posts I see about not being willing to “date”, that only real relationships come from organically meeting and so on, is in my humble opinion, an excuse.  I met Mark on eHarmony. We lived an hour apart (on a good day in LA traffic).  Almost immediately I knew there was something special about him and during our first date, we talked about the “non-negotiables”. Have we had challenges? Of course! But one of those non-negotiables also allows us to walk together (do the work) through the challenges in a way that neither one of us experienced in previous relationships.

Intentions with gratitude. Everything must be done with a heart full of gratitude. There is no other way.

So, back to the cups. There are currently 4, as one of them broke. And funny enough, I now live in a house with 4 adults. What makes me giggle is that Mark doesn’t even drink coffee. But we can sit quietly together, working or reading side by side, just being in each other’s presence, which is an amazing gift we have both been given.

As you come to the end of 2023, what intentions are you setting for 2024? Are you able to set them, bless them and release the outcome? Are you willing to do the “work” only you can do? How are you making space in your life for your dreams?

P.S. One last intentional act in Verona… touching the right breast of Juliet. But that is a story for another day.